Category Archives: Lessons in Sex

The Yoga of Sex Muscles

I began doing Kegels many years ago because I wanted to tighten my muscles for more “feeling” during sex. Then I began to get into the more subtle facets of using those built-up muscles to explore the “courtesan” in me. Many stories exist of women so highly trained that they could grip a man’s phallus and not let go until they chose to. The Kama Sutra lists the sex technique Vadavaka as “The Mare’s Trick” and a skilled woman could rhythmically and consciously massage and “milk” with her pelvic muscles. What the literature doesn’t tell is that by learning and enabling this set of muscles the body core becomes more stable and healthy… Continue reading

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Life-Long Learning – iPad Tantra

“Honey, what’s that you’re looking at?” “Oh, nothing.” “Sam, what are you looking at? Why do you have your iPad and should I be jealous?” “Uh, well, no, not exactly.” “That doesn’t tell me much. OK, now I’m getting angry!” … Continue reading

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Thank You Darwin: Phallus Evolution

Upon closer examination you can see that the upper lip of the head, or corona, is thicker than the lower part on the frenulum side. In some men it is a lot thicker. If you consider frontal intercourse positions (something that is supposed to distinguish us from many of the higher apes) then what is this thickness for? Why is it there? Evolutionarily there is always a reason… Continue reading

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I’ll Have What She’s Having: How Mirror Neurons and Music Increase Pleasure

I went to see Bonnie Raitt and Taj Mahal the other night in Oakland California. The setting was beautiful and the crowd was thrilled with the music and the vibes. Late in the program, as they sang a lusty, bluesy song together Taj began to wave his hands in the air and he encouraged us all to do it with him. Everyone began waving their hands and arms in the air and we all fell into a side-to-side sweeping, wave of ecstatic dancing! We were like one big sea anemone, an organism, waving in a sea of music and bodies and bliss. Continue reading

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Orgasms For Men: Belly Breathing And Tantric Sex (VIDEO)

The Tantrics and Taoists, in particular, have developed, over thousands of years, simple, relatively easy and obviously fun techniques to help men train themselves to last longer, choose when they might ejaculate (or not) and experience multiple orgasms without ejaculating. Orgasm and ejaculation are two separate physiological experiences. They don’t necessarily go together, it just seems that way… Continue reading

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The Curious Association Of The G-Spot And The Upper Palate

I discovered this dual connection between the mouth and the yoni quite a few years back and have never heard anyone else refer to it before. I love oral sex and had wondered why that might be so. Yes, I love to eat, so that is a part of it — OK, I’m oral! I have also noticed that during oral sex it’s the slow out-stroke that always gets me. It’s the same with intercourse. Continue reading

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Re-Wilding Your Life

If your cultural and family views didn’t hold so much weight, you might experience more freedom in your life to have the kind of love, sex and open-hearted intimacy that you really, in your heart of hearts, know is possible. You might have even experienced the essence of this a few times in your life. Profound changes might occur in the world if each of us could express ourselves with full freedom, boundaries included, and exist in a more ‘wild’ environment of our own creation… Continue reading

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Valentines: On The Importance Of Sensate Focus On Awareness (Video)

I’m lying on the beach at Mauna Kea on the Big Island of Hawai’i. This beach and the one just to the South of it, Hapuna, vie for the distinction of being the most beautiful beaches in all of the United States (Conde Nast Traveler). Of course it would be difficult not to feel as though you were in Heaven here. The breeze, the sun, the just right ocean, the soft waves and the fact that you are probably on vacation if you’re here, all add up to a wonderful experience. Continue reading

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Posted in Lessons in Sex, Massage & Touch, Neuro Science & Sex, Presence & Attention, Relationship as Guru, Ritual & Celebration, Suzie Heumann's Blog, Tantra Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sex Dreams: The Difference Between Men And Women

How often does, say, George Clooney show up in my dreams, or for that matter in any woman’s dreams? Of course, I’m specifically referring to sexual dreams. Unfortunately we don’t have any research that tells us about good old George and thee but we do have some hints about the content of sexual dreams nevertheless. Continue reading

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Sex And The Memory of Sexual Experience

Recent scientific research is beginning to investigate the relationships between experience and the memories of experience. Researchers are seeing that certain areas of the brain light up depending on the thoughts, actions and experiences of a person. Detailed maps of the brain now exist for the repeated patterns that we human’s experience. There are precise regions of the brain that light up when we see our child or grandchild. Everyone has similar patterns with slight variations that depend on how you feel about that child or grandchild. The rush of ‘love’ chemicals; dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins, opiates and other neurotransmitters, fill our body and brain quickly to produce the incredible feelings of love and attachment that are involved in the profound moment when that child’s eyes light up upon seeing you and hugging you. Continue reading

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